Sometimes, I get down.
Sometimes, I am pumped.
As an artist, I need to be around other artist. I thrive in that environment, and I’m very happy.
A new venture is ahead. I’m very excited. I can’t announce it yet, but it is coming very soon. So for now, I’m pumped again.
Follow your passions, follow your dreams, it’s work, it’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.
I love those moments when life just melts together like a grill cheese.
Last July/August, I was sitting in Atlanta Bread Company searching for a job. A friend of mine, Elissa, that I had met while working as a 2nd AD was in the restaurant as well. She came up to me and asked me if I was available to work on a project that she couldn’t. There I was looking for a job, and there she was asking me if I needed a job.
I took that job and met some of the greatest people on the set of Michael Williams’ The Atoning.
Fast forward to two days ago. I was talking with my daughter who is a musician in Nashville. She’s a member of Heidi and the Zoo Crew.
Today while at work on a break, one of my co workers pulled out a sketchbook with cool drawings. I asked him what it was for, and he said,”oh this is for my job”. I asked him what job would that be? He said “I design album covers for musicians. It was a cool moment. It took me back to the memory of The Atoning situation.
I told him that story, and we nerdly gave each other a high five.
I guess Hannibal from the A Team said it best.
” I love it when a plan comes together.”
The picture above is me with second city’s traveling improv team birthing two players. I went for the fence that night. It is something I will never forget. I was so afraid to mess up, but the guy under me and for the life of me I don’t even know his name. I owe so much to him for my success in improv.
I remember in improv rehearsal when I heard the statement Fail Big for the first time. I was glad it was explained to me soon after I heard it. It was foreign to me because I had grown up playing sports my whole life, and I often heard about winning. Losing was looked on as a bad thing in that environment. I was above average in playing sports, but my determination made up for my lack of talent. However, I hated losing, until one day I was in an environment where failing was no longer negative.
What does Fail Big mean?
It means to push the limit as far as you can till it breaks. It means that you are able to have freedom in whatever you do because if you do fail you learn something. You have pushed the limits and boundaries and landed in a place that is not familiar to you. It’s uncomfortable, but in that moment of discomfort comes the beauty of your true nature.
So don’t be afraid Fail Big! Do Great Things!
Being a mom is the biggest honor that I’ve ever received.
I don’t talk about this a lot because I try to be sensitive to those women that are friends of mine that have had difficulties having babies. I hope today that you can forgive me if this finds you in a bad place about motherhood.
Back 22 years ago today, I was given a beautiful gift that weighed six pound three ounces. This was the first time that I would become mom.
After coming home from the hospital, I remember the day that everybody left me alone for the first time with this bundle of joy. I just sat and looked at her confused on what I was supposed to do with her.
The moment that I will never forget is the moment that I realized that she was my daughter and that if I wanted to wake her from a nap, or feed her early, or give her a bath that I could. I remember that day that I tried on every outfit that she had hanging in her closet that would fit her.
I realized that with that freedom also came a great responsibility.
With every stage of development of a child comes different joys, and struggles. I didn’t understand that very well at the beginning of motherhood. You think oh we learned to walk, but then reality sets in she’s mobile and can go anywhere.
As a mom I’ve learned that you have to accept whatever comes your way, and you have to navigate through the waters that flow. Sometimes it’s the land of butterflies, and ponies, and mermaids on a rock,
and other times, it’s rain and thunder from the tears they cry.
Regardless of the season, You have to know when to listen, and when to speak. You have to know when to encourage, and when to correct. You have to continually be supportive, and the hardest is when things don’t go as planned,
and when your kids don’t listen to you, you have to be humble and console. Your human nature wants to say I told so, but that will not help the relationship you want so badly.
I still sometimes struggle with making the right decision as a mom even though my kids are grown, but that is just part of the journey.
The flip side of the whole situation is through your victories, and your mistakes, they learn how to navigate the world and deal with people. They learn things like how to be friends with people, how to have discussion without having to be right all the time, that you can love people and not always agree with them, you can trust people, and you can put your heart out there. They also learn thing like people will let you down, people aren’t perfect, and regardless of good or bad, you can get through anything. Through learning all of that they can be assured that whenever one else isn’t there, and they feel alone that mom is only a phone call away. They learn at some point that you are not the enemy, but their biggest cheerleader.
I’ve learned so much about myself, and I wouldn’t have learned these things the way I did had I not become a mom. There are people that don’t have children that have learned things that I will never know. We all have our own path. My path included becoming a mom twice.
Today, I celebrate the birth of my first born who was a gift that I constantly thank God for. She is sassy and strong willed.
She walks to the beat of her own drum.
She is stubborn as they come, but still a blessing beyond measure. I am so thankful to know her. She inspires me daily, and I love her so much.
Happy Birthday baby girl, even thought your far away tonight, you are in heart always. Know that I love watching you chase your dream with dedication and hard work.
I don’t know very many people that work as hard as you do. Thanks for making me a mom.
Michael is an amazing writer, director and filmmaker.
He made my job somewhat simple because he communicated the vision of the film so well, and he had a hands on approach to making sure that the set design, wardrobe, and props were exactly what he wanted. I had worked in the art department for several films, but this was my first as a production designer. I learned so much, and met so many new friends.
The production team was amazing as well. We just melted together. I would work with that crew a million times over.
This film was shot in West Point, Mississippi. I fell in love with the people of this town. They were so supportive of their local filmmaker, and so welcoming to those of us who were just visiting. I’ve never seen a community rally around, donate, volunteer, or support a filmmaker in this way. It was amazing to witness.
The Atoning will be screening right here in Huntsville on April 14th, 2017. You can get the info and tickets at this website.
Some people leave their hearts in San Francisco, I left part of my heart in West Point, Mississippi.
Around five years ago, my husband and I embarked on a new journey of minimal living.
My kindle book on Minimalism.
As I wrote in the book, we even quit our regular jobs, did seasonal work, and moved into a camper for almost a year.
Recently, we decided that it was time to cone back and work regular jobs to help our kids who are about to both be put of school, and to pay off some debt we incurred on our travels.
It feels great to be back in a familar place, even though we will have more space, I don’t desire to fill it up with unuseful stuff, but I want to create a minimal living enviroment that will be welcoming to friends, family, and neighbors.
I just have to keep a few things in mind.
1. Only purchase needful things that bring value.
2. If i buy new clothes, throw items away.
3. Declutter every six months.
4. Simple, simple living govea me time to enjoy my passions.
I started a new journey about a week and a half ago. Eric and I have been traveling for a bit, but after much discussion, we decided to settle back in. We applied to jobs all over the country. After multiple interviews and much soul searching, we are now employed once more. He is back doing computer work, and I am working at a musuem. I have been cross training this week, I’ve learned so much already. I’ve seen so much.
Solid Rocket Booster
Yesterday, my youngest graduated audio engineering school as the Salutatorian.
I still remember her as my baby.
As I sat and watched the ceremony unfold and her get her diploma, I was excited. As I saw her interact with her teachers and peers, and as I listened to other speak about her to me, I heard words like.
I was proud that!
I love my kids an the day they were born, I was proud and full of love for someone I didn’t know, but was a part of me. Everything else is just icing on the cake. Today was sugar sweet
I’ve spent a lot of of my life working on my weakness. After listening to Gary Vanynerchuck, my thought process is shifting. I will warn you, his language is strong, and some may be put off by what appears to be someone who has a huge ego, but I will tell you that his honesty is somewhat refreshing.
As a result of listening to Gary Vee and following him on social media, I’ve spent the last six months becoming more self aware and little by little trying to narrow down and answering questions like Who I am? What am I good at? What inspires me? What am I passionate about?
I have a Bachelors of Social Science degree in Education and an Associates degree in Health and Physical Education. I was a average student. I tried finding a job but grew very impatient, and I gave up on following my career path in coaching and teaching in the public sector. Instead of following that pat, I got married, had kids, and my family became my career. I even home schooled my kids for awhile.
Now that my kids are grown and in college, I like many am left empty and due to some poor decision making, and lack of employment find myself at 46 turning over a new leaf. I didn’t plan on being here in my life, It’s my fault. However, I don’t regret ever and never will regret staying home with my kids. They are everything to me.
For the past twelve years, I’ve been studying, acting, improvisation, and film making. After dabbling in acting, and film making, I’ve come to realize that I don’t care for the main stream market. I don’t want to move to LA, New York, or Chicago. I don’t want to work on projects that I don’t agree with just to make it in the industry. I don’t want to shop an agent for months with no success etc. I just don’t want to take all my energy at this point and establish that career.
I do love the discovery of acting, I do love the collaboration process, I absolutely love improvisation, and I love creating meaningful work. I’ve written several scripts as well. I do enjoy this process, but recent events have made me realize that I have a lot of work to do before I am even ready to embark on this as a career.
So over the past two weeks, I’ve come to discover that my original plan wasn’t to far off from what I am good at. I’ve to realize that natrually, I’m a helper, coach, and team player that wants to help people succeed. I want to be apart of a team constantly that wants to succeed in whatever they are doing.
There are so many directions that I could go in. I love sports, music, acting, and social media. I love teaching others, so I feel that is what I need to be doing on some level. In the mean time, I just have to find a day job to pay the bills.
I feel that knowing is half the battle.
Thanks Gary for helping me become more self aware.
I know I havent written a blog in a bit, but as my instagram account proves, I’m still around. I,ve just been writing a script instead of my blog. I’ve been working on this script all year, and I’m finally in the final draft now. I’m awaiting feeback from fellow writers. And once I tidy up the ending of the second script, it will be off to WGA for copyright and the library of Congress.
I have a beginning for third script, and then I will ready to submit to an agent. It’s very exciting, even though it’s time consuming. I hope you hang around the blog, exciting times lie ahead.